I first learned about surrogacy when I was 19 years old, and I immediately thought, “That is what I am meant to do!” At the time the basic requirements were that you had to be married, have had at least one healthy pregnancy, and have your own insurance. I was not married and did not have any children at the time. The friend who had been explaining it to me then told me how her sister had been an egg donor. In the same way that a surrogate would help someone grow their family, some couples needed healthy eggs to do so. I decided that I wanted to get started with that and put surrogacy on the back burner. In my early and mid twenties, I was an egg donor three times for three different families. I loved the excuse to travel to different areas of the US while I did something rewarding.
The pull to be pregnant again
Fast forward a decade, when my youngest was not far from starting full-day kindergarten and my husband and I started the conversation of whether or not we wanted more children. At that point, we were done with diapers and sleepless nights and almost done with car seats. Did we really want to start all of that over again? While emotionally I did not want to start over again, I did feel the pull to be pregnant again. I loved being pregnant. That was when I was reminded of surrogacy. I could be pregnant again, help another family, use the compensation to pay off some debt AND not start the parenting cycles over again? Sounded too good to be true!
From first call to positive test
I reached out to a local agency in September of 2015, had my match meeting with my potential intended parents in October, had my medical clearance appointment in November, and started medications for my embryo transfer cycle in January of 2016. The first transfer worked and I was officially pregnant!
Why I wanted to do this
One of the biggest reasons I wanted to be a surrogate is twofold. I had known many couples who would have been amazing parents that struggled to conceive, and some never had the chance to have children. I also knew a few women who were not great mothers and seemed to continually get pregnant and have more children. Both sides broke my heart, and I wanted to do what I could to help. So here I was, doing the thing!
One of my favorite memories while being pregnant was running into an old acquaintance who said, “I see your family is growing,” and my husband responded, “Oh, that is not my baby.” When he gave us both a very confused and awkward look, I added, “It is not my baby either.” Now he was really confused.
Delivery day
In October of 2016 I delivered a healthy baby boy. Mom and Dad were not only in the delivery room, but my midwife asked my intended mother to gown up and she allowed her to pull her baby out of me. It was such an amazing experience. Everyone in the room was crying.